My time in Tonga, especially in Vavaʻu, marked the beginning of what would become a full month in the first island nation of many on my 2018 voyage across the Pacific. I explored Tongatapu, swam with whales off of ʻEua, and had long overdue rest and reset in Uoleva, Haʻapai. What I did not realize at the time was that this chapter would ignite a whole side of me I had always been destined to become: a cultural voyager.
That all began on Vava’u!
Arriving in Vavaʻu and Being Welcomed In
I arrived by plane from the Haʻapai islands into beautiful Vavaʻu, a place of endless coves, rolling hills, inlets, and a stunning harbor. Unlike some of my earlier arrivals that felt more like ordinary travel, this one was different. I was welcomed into the warm embrace of a Tongan family through a connection passed on from a friend I had made along the way.
That changed everything. I was no longer just arriving in a place. I was being brought into it.
What Was Vava’u Like
Adjusting to Vavaʻu’s unique landscape and essence brought me to the northern cliffs, to the island’s highest peak, into the center and market of Neiafu, and to Mango Café, where I would eventually find a captain and sail onward to Fiji.
But beyond the scenery and movement around the island, something deeper was happening. Once I had settled into village life for the first time ever, my host approached me with one simple question: “Anthony, what would you like?” Without hesitation, I answered, “I want to live like you.”
From that moment on, my cultural voyaging had truly begun.
What I Learned About Tongan Culture
Community truly meant community.
What I learned about Tongan culture was grounded in community, shared responsibility, and the way people looked out for one another. In ways that, as an American, felt both fascinating and foreign to me at first. I adjusted quickly, and I fell in love with that way of life. The kind of ownership I had grown up understanding did not seem to operate in the same way here.
Everyone had their share of crops, kava plants, and other resources. I remember seeing a man on a farm tractor and asking whether it belonged to him. My host explained that it did not, that he was borrowing it and doing work for the village. There was a strong sense that things were meant to be used, shared, and distributed in a way that supported the wider community. No one was meant to be left behind. It was a beautiful thing to witness.
“The Friendly Islands” is not just a catchy phrase. It felt real to me. I experienced warmth, welcome, and kindness not only in Vavaʻu, but throughout Tonga as a whole.
Food on Vavaʻu
Food in Vavaʻu, Tonga gave me another layer of understanding into daily life in the Kingdom. I cannot say for certain whether fish distribution worked in the same communal way as Tokelauan inati, but when it came to gathering and sharing food for the family, “family” clearly extended beyond the household. It included neighbors in the village, who often shared what they had grown, farmed, or gathered.
As for the food itself, I still remember the mix of everyday staples and traditional foods. There were the quick pick-me-ups of instant noodles, mackerel, and rice, but also taro, kape, talo Tonga, bananas, and fresh coconut cream squeezed by hand. And then there was the Sunday umu feast, one of the first of many I would enjoy in Tonga and across the Pacific.
What Living Like a Tongan Really Means
The video I eventually published was titled Living Like A Tongan, and that title came directly from the experience itself. It came from that moment when I told my host that I wanted to live like him. Later, in one of the documented clips, I said it plainly: “Living Like A Tongan, that’s how my time has been here on Vavaʻu, Tonga.” And looking back, my time in Vavaʻu planted the seed for the kind of cultural immersion that would later shape projects like Living Like A Palauan & Living Like a Hawaiian.
Even though I spent only one week in Vavaʻu, that one week taught me enough to gain a meaningful understanding of life in the Kingdom. I came away with a stronger sense of kindness, compassion, pride, oneness, family, and hospitality.
Because I was willing to learn, I was given a front row seat to better understand that way of life. I drank kava with the men, shared an umu on Sunday, dressed in a tupenu and ta‘ovala for church, fed pigs, watered kava roots, rode around the island, and practiced whatever Tongan language I could.
It has now been eight years since I hopped on that sail and watched the Kingdom disappear on the horizon. Since then, my voyaging has carried me to Fiji, Tuvalu, Palau, Tokelau, and the Samoan islands on both sides. In every one of those places, I have immersed even deeper through home-stays and community life, much like I first did in Vavaʻu. Even more, that path has grown into storytelling through my mission, One Ocean, One People.
Final Thoughts
If anyone asked me what my experience in Tonga was like, my answer would be simple. It changed my life in ways only the journey itself can fully explain.
Tonga is beautiful in its scenery, but just as beautiful in the heart of its people. That, to me, goes far beyond anything a typical traveler’s guide could offer. Because Living Like A Tongan was the best way anyone could truly experience the Kingdom.
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This work is part of One Ocean, One People, a registered 501(c)(3) nonprofit dedicated to documenting and sharing Pacific Island cultures and stories. All support helps fund fieldwork, travel to remote islands, and the production of educational storytelling across Oceania.
